Tuesday, August 11, 2009

The "Gracie" Symphony Orchestra...will be playing each night at 11pm...indefinitely

Every single night, the devil himself appears in his conductor's suit, standing in front of the orchestra of memories, waving his little baton...and each memory plays a horrifying solo and there's no intermission. And each night I sit in the balcony listening, no *FEELING*, each note from each instrument and it pierces through my heart like a sword. Each breath is more painful than the last and I can feel the blood seeping through the red velvet dress he forced me to wear.

I am unable to look away from the stage and yet even if I could look away, it would do no good; as the dark, painful music would continue to assault me, caring not if my eyes were closed or open.

What happens when I am unable to keep myself from toppling over the balcony at this symphony of hell?
I will fall....broken & alone...and....

I do know what will happen.
No one will be there to catch me
And I am terrified of tomorrow...
terrified that it will come to pass and equally terrified that it won't....


  1. ((((Gracie))))
    Sitting here listening dear one.

  2. Dearest Gracie,

    Listening and sending safe Hugs to you.




  3. Hi Ladies...Thanks for the company.
    Still breathing...sometimes that's all we can do, right?
    Your support has been been a faint light of hope for me right now. I see it - in the distance - and I try to focus on it - and 'feel' it - because it's a feeling of safety and not of fear.
    (hugs) back to both of you...
    ~ Gracie