Sunday, September 27, 2009

I don't have a good feeling about this...

I'm not sure what that means, really. I don't put much stock in my 'feelings' ~ because let's face it ~ I learned a long time ago that my feelings don't really matter. It doesn't matter what I think ,or what I think I didn't then, and from my perspective, that still holds true now.

I have a session with DT tomorrow and I don't have a good feeling about it... History has shown that Monday sessions aren't good and I end up wasting my time, unwilling to focus or talk about what I need to talk about, and I leave pissed up and unheard.

And I'm afraid it will be that way during tomorrow's session...and since I'm going out of town on Tuesday, I desperately need it NOT to go that way. And my fear is that it will. And then I will rebel and do something really stupid while I'm out of town, or the rational Grace will be no where to be found, leaving me unprepared and lost during a crucial meeting...

I'm not sure what to do ~ part of me wants to cancel and avoid the session all-together - therefore eliminating the chance that it will go poorly...Especially since it's been a really hard weekend for me (they typically are) and I'm angry because of it.

I don't what to do with that.... No show?

1 comment:

  1. I'm having a similar problem. I have an appointment Monday and I'm dreading it. I already feel very distant from all the crap that caused me to schedule it, but then it might be right around the corner waiting to pounce on me again. That's usually the way it goes. And then there is the trust issue. I would give you advice on what to do, but my advice in this case would not-so-smart to listen to seeing the mess I'm in myself. I sure understand how it feels to have this problem, though. It sucks.