Friday, December 4, 2009

Not going to make it tonight...

Broken...left a vm for the therapist to call me but hold no expectations that she will.
I can't do it tonight.
I want it to stop because I can't do it now.
Too tired.
want to be dead.
no fight left.
what's the point.  I want to be dead!
i'm so tired of being here
I wish he would have killed me!!!
I cant do it!!!!!!!
Such a stupid fucking worthless whore she si!
I hate all of her!
it's suffocating me tonight
sqeezing my chest before I can take a breath
i cant breathe


  1. I don't feel like showing up to anything, either. It's too hard to pretend for something that's not mandatory.

  2. ((((((((((grace))))))))))

    Silently standing by your side, waiting for the clouds to lift...

  3. Grace - I've been reading your blog for the past two hours. You are an incredibly strong person and I am so sorry for your pain. You are very real in this blog and your writing wears no mask. I sincerely hope you find your way to healing very very soon, with or without DT.

  4. Lynn, me too...I'll do it tho - party Grace will show up...hopefully keeping the darkness at bay until we're alone.

    Thank you, Zan and JBR

    Harriet, Thank you saying that and for the hope...sometimes I lose sight of that. "hope"