Monday, April 27, 2009

I LOVE DBT and Marsha is a GENIUS! (I would totally drink the kool-aid if she offered it to me!)

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHH! CLOSE YOUR EYES! IT'S BURNING!!!!!!!!!!!! Quick! Someone pour some water on her to see if she melts! She won't leave, I've already hidden her broomstick!

That, my friends is opposite emotion. I'm so happy I learned that because I am BATHED in relief now!
But truly, someone could have just told me that DBT is "fake it till you feel it" therapy, it would have saved me a lot of time, energy and money.

See, you have to 'change' the emotions you don't 'want'. Just change them. If you're angry, then do the opposite. If you're sad, get dressed and get the hell out of your house!

See, everyone has a reason for doing something. And you should 'walk a mile in their shoes' so you can understand. Um...there's nothing to understand about a man who fucks children!
"Well, maybe he's crazy" - So the fuck what! I don't care! That doesn't make me less angry!
Apparently I'm failing this fucking class because I leave pissed off even if I arrive as suzi sunshine! Yes, I should be able to "step" into a pedophile/rapists shoes because then I'd be able to understand why they do what they do. And they do have a reason."We" just don't know what that reason is.

Yeah- well I had a "reason" for my self destructive behavior and escape from reality- but no one put themselves in my fucking shoes- I just get told to shut up and behave! I fucking hate all of it! Yes, her program works so well- I arrived at class tonight calm and relaxed - and when I left, I wanted to drive my car right into the rocky mountains!

Yes, the borderline is out of control again! Go figure! Too bad she didn't practice opposite emotion. *tsk, tsk* You know, she's starting to question things again, express her feelings, it must be time for a "medication adjustment" - or perhaps add abilify- that seems to be the "cure all" drug of the year! The 'prozac' of 2009.

Perhaps Marsha would like to walk a mile in my shoes, so she can feel what it's like to be a 5 year old and be ripped apart while a grown man (a man you should trust, feel safe with, a man who is your father) fucks you. I'll get a pair of heels out of the closet right now and set them out for her.

Stop on by, Marsha, I'll be here..."mindfully" awaiting your arrival!
Perhaps we can share some chamomile tea and you can borrow one of my hair barrettes. And then if we have time, we can go get your hair cut...and maybe a facial for you...cause DAMN! How about you take some time to "mindfully" attend to your appearance!

Lighten up, Marsha - it was just a joke! I was practicing "opposite emotion".
I feel hate for you and I wanted to call you the "C" word ~ but instead, I nicely offer to take you out for a makeover. How skillful am I? Your star pupil!

Oh, and Marsha, I want to make every effort to accommodate you when you're taking that mile hike in my heels. Let me know if you prefer: red, black, brown, gray...spiked or block, open ot close toed...patent leather is an option, but not in the brown. Oh ~ and I wear size 7- I hope that's okay with you.

And after your hike as *Grace,* I'd love to hear all about it ~ So if you could mindfully prepare a 'white' page (not a thesis - I know how theoretical you can be) I prefer logic (the real thing, not the opposite), and 300 words or less - I am NOT a dialectician, nor do I play one on TV, like you do. Tonight, Marsha-baby, we are playing by my rules. I "strongly encourage" you to have this report on my desk by end of day Friday.

*Half-Smile* to you, Sister Linehan.

Wisemindfully yours,
~ Grace

OOPS! It's opposite emotion day! How about "not a wise thought going through my crazy mind tonight" ~ Yes, that seems like a better fit...