Saturday, April 25, 2009

Postcard from Hopeless Haven Camp

I arrived at “Hopeless Haven” camp today!

I’m so happy my parents sent me to this dark and dreary place!

I just arrived – my flight was late taking off…apparently we were waiting for a few straggling personalities to arrive…and, as it turns out, the machine that destroys luggage was broken, so they were doing it manually - which always takes longer. The in-flight movie was "Girl Interrupted"~ I decided against that - already living that dream - don't need to watch it on the big-screen Very turbulent flight but Captain Crash was able to land the plane and once the smoke cleared from the screeching brakes he taxied what was left of the plane to the gate and we all climbed our way out of the wreckage and into the terminal - which was littered with signs of doom and gloom!

Here are a few posters, just to give you a 'flavor':
"In a real dark night of the soul, it is always three o'clock in the morning, day after day."

"The secret source of humor itself is not joy, but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven."

"To perceive is to suffer"

"Have a nice day"~ it cures chronic depression!

After walking for what seemed like 10 miles, I finally made it to the monorail~ only to see this sign: “If you board the wrong train, it is no use running along the corridor in the other direction.”
But it was a short shuttle ride to Hopeless Haven, and I was pleased to see that I arrived just in time for “UN-Happy Hour”!

Featured drinks are 2 for 1 and the offerings were extensive, and included:

Crying Cosmopolitan
Morbid Mojito
Solitary Whiskey Sour
Borderline Amber Beer
Depressive Daiquiri
Compulsive Pina Colada (with Coconut Rum)
Bailey’s Bipolar Irish Cream
Anorexic Amaretto (calorie free, of course)
Bulimic Brandy (w/an extra long stir stick for ‘after’)

It is so dark and cold at the Haven...more about that after a few Crying won’t seem so bad….

More later....


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