It’s back again ~ that uninvited feeling.
It never asks if it’s welcome.
It just comes back again and again, that feeling of absolute hopelessness.
It wells up inside of you, consumes you, you try to hide it, but you can’t.
The darkness shows in the shallow tears that fill your wretched blue eyes.
The hollow despair is visible in the sardonic smile that sits heavily on your face.
You wonder why it’s there…
You wonder if it will ever end…
You want to scream and cry and rant and rave!
You want to run away. You want out of this life! You want a better one!
A life without all of these tears! A life without the fears!
You want a life without pain and disillusionment…
One with love and not lies…
But there is no out.
So you sit…and you wait…
And it hurts…and it’s lonely…
And there’s pain and there’s fear
Because there is no out…
There’s only ‘this’…
Hey, Grace! You ARE still around! So glad to see that. As you probably know, I can definitely relate to the hopelessness. I just came out of a time of a lot of hopelessness myself. I had a bad car accident back in November...then surgery...and it brought out a lot of trauma stuff for me.
ReplyDeleteBut, the real reason I want to comment here today is to say goodbye. I'm making the rounds in the blogosphere as I just put up my last post after five years of blogging. I want to thank you for your honesty, your courage in sharing and your empathy. You're an amazingly empathic blogger. I always felt so much survivor solidarity with you. I wish you peace and as many moments of hope as you can get as you continue your amazing journey. ((((((((safe & gentle hugs)))))))
((((Grace)))) So sorry for these feelings you are experiencing.
ReplyDelete